Thursday, May 05, 2005

Daughter's monologue

This is a (nearly) verbatim transcript of a speech my four-year-old daughter made to herself in the bathroom just now (she didn't know I was listening from the next room). I hope she doesn't mind the invasion of privacy when she is older. Note: her brother is 11 months old and she doesn't have a sister.

"The synagogue is the place where we pray to God. The Temple is another synagogue in the city. We have a synagogue. I am six years old. My friends are Jewish too. They might not go to the same places. My teacher is Mrs. S----. She is Jewish. Other people can go to synagogue even if they are not Jewish. The Jewish people have to pray to God. Because God saved the Jewish people. Only God can save your life. My little brother is soooo crazy around the house because he doesn’t know God can save your life. We have to take care of him lots of times. He says ‘Poopyhead’ and we don’t like that. And Mommy and Daddy don’t like it either. My sister said ‘I don’t like my little brother and I want him to go away.’ But I explained that he can’t go away because he is part of the family. Me and my sister play together very often. When we eat a lot of matzah we don’t poop so much. When it’s a weekend I stay home with my Nona or my mommy or daddy. For now on, I don’t have Passover. The first letter in my name is “D” and then “-” and then “-” and then an “-” and then an “-” and an “-” and another “-” and then “-” and that’s how you spell my name. I better wash my hands. I have one paci[fier] and I only have it in the car, when I’m sleeping, or when I’m getting picked up. Actually, I have it all the time and it’s not such a big deal. I’m a big sister. Now I’m four. No, now I’m thirteen.

5 comments:

PsychoToddler said...

My daughter has similar monologues, though not as deep.

Unknown said...

That was the cutest thing I have ever read!

torontopearl said...

I love her loquaciousness!

Have I got a shidduch for your daughter: my five-year-old son.
No doubt, all her "poop" references will prove to be a turn-on. He and his siblings are very "anal."

Anonymous said...

I loved the monologue. It took me back a few years to the days when our kids were toddlers. I particularly enjoyed the half hour in the car, when I picked them up from school and listened to their comments about the day.

Ahistoricality said...

For my son, age is a function of height: when he's standing on something, he's older; how old depends on whether it's a stepstool, chair, parental shoulders, etc.